Thursday, June 17, 2010

suckage, bu-uddy!

So another complaint of old friends. Been putting of meeting with Damian, mostly because I used to have a bit of a crush on him. So I went over to his house with Brent and it was soon apparent that well.........another "i just don't enjoy spending time with you."
I tried really hard. But it's another LONG rambling conversation in which nobody realizes when I am joking and Damian makes lame jokes and laughs at them when no one else will....... It's funny how people can be having an okay time when I am dying to get away. The conversation feels strained to me and I'm putting on an act of ''quirkily shy but dynamic nicole." I start playing with words and manipulating the conversation and purposely interrupting Damian so he'll forget what he was talking about... and even THAT stops being entertaining after a while. So I make up a lame excuse and book it, dragging Brent along with me.
See, the FRUSTRATING part is that Brent and I can have a blast of a time, just us together, but EVE hates us hanging out one-on-one. Which sucks, because there really is none of that romantic tension or anything like that. So the one person I can have fun with, I have to always be accompanied by a third person to appease l'Eve. The third person is almost always Jason or someone LIKE Jason, who drowns out Brent and I have to listen to them go on and on and on and on and on. So boring.

so this is why i SO MUCH prefer my own room. because there's no one to talk to. I long for someone I can talk to, who will get my jokes, and make me laugh a REAL laugh, smile a REAL smile.....................................................................................................

and ALWAYS always always, out of nowhere someone ALWAYS brings up
"you know that one facebook profile picture of you hugging that guy"
THAT guy will forever haunt me, apparently. i always hope and pray they are talking about the picture of me hugging a snowman I made.

me: huh? me and the snowman?
person: WTF?? noooo the guy who is WAY so happy
me: you know, almost every one of my photos has a happy person in it
person: The blond guy, the one who is smiling and looks way ****ing happy, you know?
me: oh

I mean, it's thrilling to again and again wish Cody had left his dumb camera at home, leaving no evidence the concert ever occurred. Because I am soooooo sick of explaining it really isn't your business whether or not I like/liked him. And no he wasn't my boyfriend but he could have been but he most definitely wasn't. I kind of go into an EFF YOU CODY phase whenever people like Damian or Eve bring up THAT guy.

Even though I would pretty much kill something to be able to converse with him again, because no one here compares with him.

EFF. THIS SUCKS

Friday, June 11, 2010

Acoustique!!

I've come to a healthier point of this crush. It is just a crush. No twitterpating, not much besides I like Cody. Obviously I've tried to not like him, and failed. So why not just simply crush on him until I meet someone new? I won't meet somebody new until August.
Why not quietly rock out to Airborne Toxic Event and Nickel Creek? Je suis laissing it l'acoustique.
Franglish mmmmmmmmmmmHMmmm!

Currently my comment on Mormon Bachelor Pad is being held up on their side bar. Heck yes, Nicole is finally becoming famous.

Wednesday, June 2, 2010

:P

another nightmare.. worse than usual